Showing posts with label Empowering Women. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Empowering Women. Show all posts

Wednesday, 14 October 2015

THREE THINGS, NOT TO SAY TO A WOMAN WHO HAS SUFFERED A MISCARRIAGE OR STILL BIRTH


* I know how you feel.

Because you do not! Even if you have been through your own loss, you do not know who another woman is suffering.


* You can always have another.

Maybe she cannot. Maybe like me, there is also a history of infertility. Maybe the loss has created internal damage. Or just maybe her heart is too heavy to try again.


* It was for the best.

Never ever, ever say this. Saying the mother, was too young, too old, too many other children, too broke, will not heal the hurt of losing her baby.


What you can do is ask her. Ask her what she needs. Never assume.





Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day takes place on October 15, 2015. Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day is a day of remembrance for pregnancy loss and infant death, which includes but is not limited to miscarriage, stillbirth, SIDS, or the death of a newborn. 

Thursday, 16 April 2015

C SECTION MUMMAS, SOMETHING FOR YOU

Three and a half years on, my scar still hurts. I get twinges along the scar, often. Sometimes when I lift things the 'wrong' way. it pulls like I am going to come apart like a zipper.

However, I love my C section scar. I am proud of it. Through this was Jarvis's SAFE entry into the world. Yes, I capitalised safe, because I do not care how my two babies were born, as long as they were born safely. (For the record Tamika was a quick and safe vaginal birth)


I have had people, normally other Mums, express disappointment. I even had one to go as far as ask if I was disappointed "I did not have a successful birth?" Excuse me, but what the?

Tamika put a link to this article on my Facebook page. For those who have not read it I thought I would share it with you. Three Truths About C-sectionMamas

I recommend reading the whole article, but this paragraph so resonated with me.

1. C-Section mamas are brave.
Being prepped for a c-section is not a walk through the park. Many times, a mothers partner is not allowed in the OR until after the epidural has been administered and everyone has taken their place. This means that while doctors and nurses move about, readying the operating room for delivery (maybe talking about their lunch or what movie they saw over the weekend) a strong pregnant mama sits on a cold operating table considering what lies before her - often scared and often feeling very alone. 
Yup, look at my face in the image. You will not see disappointment at having to prep for a C, you see cold hard fear, and typical me when I am emotional, I cry. Plus a needle in the spine freaken hurts.

So for anyone who has ever felt doubt at their C section stand proud, you are a brave strong women who birth a child. Did you know April is Cesarean Awareness Month? 

How did you birthing go? Any stories you want to share? 

Monday, 30 March 2015

MUM'S IN BUSINESS: BETTINA LITTLE OLD SOULS

Do you ever find a couple things happen in a row that are strangely connected? On Sunday night Tamika sent me a link on Facebook about a Mother having a sickie and taking a day off for herself, along with the comment 'we should do this". Later that night Bettina from Little Old Souls sent me an email telling me I had won a copy of her book.


Okay universe what are you telling me?

Bettina's book: Mothering the Soul is a guide to help you find contentment and empowerment in Motherhood through nurturing your body, mind and spirit.

I downloaded it to my kindle on Sunday night and lay down next to Jarvis to read it. Is it helping? Well on Monday I finally went and got a massage. Tamika gave me the voucher for Christmas. Okay, I fully admit I still took Jarvis with me. He sat like an angel the entire time. So, I have not fully learnt to allow myself some 'me' time, but after one chapter I did allow myself the thought that I need to respect myself more.

So ask yourself this:

Do you sometimes feel overwhelmed by Motherhood?  Maybe a little bit resentful or frustrated by the lack of time for you?  Maybe you even direct those feelings towards someone close to you?

Do you feel like you have lots of things you want to achieve but there is never any time to follow those passions or dreams? Are you always putting yourself last?


If the answer is yes to even one for those I fully recommend you purchase Bettina's book and support a Mum. Here is a link to her book Mothering the Soul.

I will give you an update in the book once I have finished reading it.

Thursday, 19 March 2015

HOW DO YOU ACCEPT A COMPLIMENT?

Am I the only one who finds it hard to personally accept compliments? And how do you possibly talk about them without sound like a, well a conceited wank?


But, since I have talked about negative feedback and reactions from others, I thought I should talk about how there are people, out there who can be super nice, who give compliments.

There is a girl a work who is lovely to everyone. Said my hair looked like a beautiful mermaid. She is positive about so much and towards so many people.

Then on Monday I took Jarvis to Wet & Wild on the coast. Yup got this 47 year old unfit white body out in a bikini. Sometimes the thought crosses my mind that maybe I should cover up more because of my age. But then I go and play with Jarvis and forget about body issues.

Long story, but was chatting to another Mum while our kids played together in the water. She asked if I had adopted Jarvis. When I said no, her response... "No way, your body does not look like it has ever been pregnant or given birth". When I told her Jarvis was my second, plus I was a grandmother, she then asked/stated "wow you must spend so much time at the gym to have such a great body".

Wasn't sure how to tell her I never exercise. Plus I got all uncomfortable with her compliments. My first response was to argue, "my body is not that good", "I am old", "I have lumps and bumps" and so on. Rather to say thank you. My instinct was to deny. 

Am I the only one who has not learnt/been taught how to accept a compliment?

What do you do?

Do you mumble like an idiot like I do? 

On a side note: The image has nothing to do with the post. I just like this shot of Justin and I done together, and I do not think I have ever shared how amazing they all are. Took my ages to pick just this one. And no we are not nude, this image just makes us look like we both were. Though I did make Justin take his shirt off. Yep, I do enjoy a good perv on my partner. 

Monday, 9 March 2015

MUMS IN BUSINESS: RABBIT'S WARREN CAFE

So this post, is all about shameless promotion of my daughter's business. But I am so proud of her! How many 22 years old decide to just go for it and follow their dreams? Tamika, along with her partner, have opened a cafe in Brisbane Fortitude Valley. Think that is a big step? add in a five month old baby, Guy working nights, plus going to uni, and you have one very busy Mumma.




Jump onto Rabbit's Warren Cafe Facebook page and give them a like. 

Read underneath Tamika's interview, I have a special offer for everyone who visits the cafe and mentions Iliska Dreams. Yup, everyone for the rest of March will get this offer on me. 

1. Tell the readers a little about yourself, can you share a bit on yourself and your background?

I am a 22 year old, Mum to 5 month old boy called Chester.

Throughout high school I worked at McDonald's McCafe. I started that job when I was 14. Macca's paid for an iPod, a car, a trip to Spain, and many laptops and phones throughout the 4 years I was employed with them.

I decided to leave McDonald's when I graduated high school. I wanted to move on from a high school job and I wanted to start my life. However I got stuck, I got stuck in admin. To put it bluntly, I hated it! I hated being pushed around, I didn't like being treated like crap! It made me a really angry person. I started, and stopped, Uni three times not feeling inspired to make a career for myself. I was definitely lacking in motivation.

Then, in 2013 I fell pregnant, and that's when I really felt like I needed to change my life. 


2. What inspires you?
My family, and my partner Guy. Guy works nights in a dead end job to support us, while still at Uni finishing his law/business degree. Even though he has stopped and started a few times, he always pushes through and proves to me he can do so much more with life.

My mum, she has done more degrees then any person I know. She may not have found her passion until now, but she taught me that I don't have to pick just one thing I like or I am good at. Life is all about experimenting and failing until you find something you really enjoy.


3. How did you begin your business?
Guy and I have always dreamed about owning a cafe or a bar.

Since I have known Guy it's all he's ever talked about it; one day, on one of our many breakfast dates, we planned out owning our own cafe.

It wasn't until January 2015 Guy saw an ad for this cafe in the Valley, and sent me the link as a joke. I didn't think he was joking, and told him to call the woman to discuss a time to meet. From there, it took off. 


4. How do you balance life and running a business?
To be honest, it's really hard! I wanted to have a full year off with my son. I am just lucky to have an amazing support network. I knew it wasn't going to be easy. Being a mother to a newborn isn't easy in it's self.

Now I have the cafe it's multiplied, my stress levels are through the roof. The thing I enjoy the most is at the end of the day knowing I get to come home to Chester. Taking time out just to be with him.


5. What direction do you see yourself and your company heading?
To be honest, I don't really know where I would like to see this going. We only just started. I am just happy we are following our dreams.


6. What advise would you give someone else wanting to start/run their own business?
Do it! No matter what! Do not let anything stop you from starting your own business or new adventure.

You don't know if you're going to succeed until you have tried.

For me, I didn't want to not try, and regret later in life, even though right now it is a juggle for our family. This may be the best thing we do for our future. 







For all of my social media followers, here, on Facebook and on Instagram I have teamed up with Rabbit Warren's Cafe to offer a special deal...for the rest of March!

1. Buy one drink and get the second for free. You can either give it to a friend on the day, or come back again for your freebie.

2. For every Mum/parent who comes in with their children, for every purchase you make the kids will get a free drink.


All you have to do is mention Iliska Dreams. 

Wednesday, 25 February 2015

WHEN WILL MUMS START BEING NICE TO EACH OTHER?

So on Tuesday I thought I would be brave, and do lots of running around/chores with the two boys. After a bad night sleep and a six am start, I threw on what ever I thought would be A. comfy and B. baby proof. Leaving the house meant packing enough stuff for a gazillion options, I was exhausted just loading the car.


This is a tale not of having a go at another Mum, but of one reminding Mums to be nice to one another.

I had just finished the groceries, and Chester opted at the check out, to do the giant poop babies are famous for. So off to the change room. I blandly chat to the young Mum next to me, we have both got exploding poos and we each ask age and name of said poo machine. While this is happening another Mum comes up to me really close, I thought she needed to change her baby, and was peeved we were taking awhile.

She then said (right up in my face while gesturing up and down my body) "mothers like you make the rest of us feel bad". The young girl next to me asked if I knew her, when I stated I did not she turned to this Mum and told her... well I will use the PG version to "eff off you fat slag".

I have no idea why this woman was up in my face, no I was not having it easy. Any mother, or person, looking after a toddler and a newborn will tell you it is hard work. I am not angry at her I actually just felt sad. Why do women/ Mums feel the need to attack others? Each any every Mum (parent) is fighting their own battle so how about we show Mums so love?

So I am going to dedicate this post to two Mums I know that do incredible jobs. Lila over at Muma Nourish  and Christina at A Little Bird Told Me. You two are extraordinary and inspiring!

Question, what do you do with your arms in photos, so awkward?!

Sunday, 15 February 2015

STEPS TO FINDING MY HAPPY

If January was all about planning, early February seems to have been all about getting things into place, Including giving myself a week to mourn.

Then like a switch was hit in the last few days I have been filled with creativity. My sewing machine has been going none stop.


Okay well, not none stop. I have also spent a lot of time with the people that heal my heart. Including lots of babysitting Chester. (Tamika and Guy hope to open their cafe on Monday. More on that later.)

But, time with them, has me filled with creative ideas. Abstaining from my goal of opening an online store has been useful, it also seems that creating distance allowed me to actualize what I do and do not want. 

For a long time, research has pointed to happiness as being the ideal state to create in. So I guess I had to find my happy.

For me I had to :
1. Let go of negativity. Learn to forgive and forget.
2. Live in the present. Actually be with and concentrate on the now.
3. Treat everyone with kindness. Being careful with my words. Speaking gentler, kinder, and wiser. And listen more than I talk.

Obviously still working on my list, but for now it seems to be working.

And yes I know there are things like eating healthy and exercise, but lets face it no way I am going to do that shite. I am too busy eating chocolate and playing with Jarvis.


How do you find your happy? 

Wednesday, 28 January 2015

JANUARY GOALS

This year, I decided my word for the year was believe. Well, since I am greedy and picked three... Believe in Myself. And since I am such a lover of lists, I opted to make a list of three things I want to achieve each month in regards to feeling self worth and growing my business.


Betinna recommended a Brendan Burchard podcast on starting your dream and his advice was - if it's really important to you, you can find time to do just three things a day towards it. I thought this tied in really well with my list of three goals per month.

January Goals
1. Narrow down what you want to start selling. Get a focus to your stock ideas.
2. Spend fifteen minutes per day improving my skills, and learning new techniques.
3. Take action.

Did I manage this for January? Did I manage to do three things each and every day? Yes on every day off, but struggled on days I work.

1. I have gained clarity in regards to this, now looking at fabric choices and suppliers.

2. This has been the easiest to do, I love learning new skills. Every day off, I have allowed at least half an hour in my sewing area. I need to find how to achieve me time as well.


3. I read this on Bloggers Bazaar: Imagine your life as if you’ve already achieved your goals. What will it look like? What will it feel like? Imagine feeling totally confident in yourself. Now, from that place of total confidence, ask yourself what kind of actions you would take if you were already successful? Choose one small action to take right away. Action brings clarity. I found one and two allowed me to achieve three. 

P.S How cute are my new clothing labels?! More on them later.

Monday, 26 January 2015

MUMS IN BUSINESS: THE FIFTH ELEMENT LIFE

I stumble upon Sarah via my favourite social media, Instagram. I am honest enough and shallow enough to admit her hair and her smile sucked me into her page. Then I discovered her business ethos and stunning mandala rings, and I became a true fan. Sarah is a perfect example of a mother who has grown her business organically. Sarah's Facebook page, Instagram account and Website are all amazing. Please visit Sarah and give her some extra love.



1. Tell the readers a little about yourself, can you share a bit on yourself and your background?
I don't like to carry a million labels to define who I am, so I always say I'm a woman who wanders the path of her spirit. I have a background in the fashion design industry, and lead that life path until my mid 20's when I feel pregnant and my whole life changed for the better. I left work, embarked on my most important role as a mum and spent a year rediscovering who I really was. I blogged my journey of spiritual discovery, and developed a really organic online presence which led my down this current path utilising my design background, creativity and spirituality. I now live on the Sunshine Coast, with my little family and am building my business to a point where it can fund my philanthropic dreams of starting an animal sanctuary on some acreage here - A place where people can come and dwell, learn about living off the land, work with the animals and help me rehabilitate them and educate the future generations about respecting all life forms and how to truly connect with one another and the planet. 

2. What inspires you?
My son, nature, my kindred sisterhood. I have some incredible customers, friends and soul sisters and they always keep me creating and inspired in my work and life. My son is my biggest source of inspiration - he has taught me so much about myself and he makes me want to be a better version of myself, everyday.

3. How did you begin your business?
I had the idea during my pregnancy to make mandala rings. At the time, I didn't even know why - it was more an aesthetic thing. When I was literally 9 months pregnant, I just designed these 20 symbolic designs in just over 24 hours. They just came so organically, I was definitely being guided by something other than myself (I didn't even know how to use photoshop or any digital programs very well to make them). After that, it took me a good year to understand them, develop my prototypes and hoan in on my vision and offerings. I am someone who is abundant in ideas, but not necessarily good on the follow through, so It took me a while to really focus in on delivering a small, concise offering and really hustling to get that out into the world. Just after my sons 1st birthday, I launched my new baby - The Fifth Element Life store (had been blogging under this name for 8 months) and I've been loving the journey ever since.

4. How do you balance life and running a business?
It is a daily challenge. One thing I owe my productivity to in that first year was changing my diet and doing allot of self care. I am always mindful that my son comes first, and the business second. Sometimes I get lost in the business as it now demands so much more of my attention, however I am lucky enough to have a partner who has been able to take on more of the household duties while I build the business (this kind of happened by default, but everything happens for a reason). Right now, I'm having to make some big decisions because I know in myself that things are out of balance, so my priority now is to hire my first staff member (!!!!) so I can get back to the self care and be a more present mum and partner. Every nap time, every spare moment in the last 2 years has been spent working on my own personal development or my business and now it has had that solid foundation work, I can let go and get back into enjoying the life I have created.

5. What direction do you see yourself and your company heading?
I see us moving into a commercial space this year, where I have a small team of amazing people who will do the day to day running of The Fifth Element Life. I'll be able to be part-time at home with my son, and the rest working towards building my brand and creating more products, offerings and gifts for the world. As it grows, a percentage I will be putting aside to save for the purchase of the property to then start the sanctuary (as mentioned above). I see me always having a work day that looks different, switching in from mama, entrepreneur, creative, spiritual and philanthropic being day in and day out. 

6. What advise would you give someone else wanting to start/run their own business?
Start small. Work with the resources you have. I started my business with $1000 of my tax money that I got back from my previous working year before having my son. We had to make it work. Do plenty of inner and outer hustle. I believe the more you work on yourself and your inner harmony, the more that comes out into your business world. The minute you notice that things are not working in any aspect of your life, learn from it and focus on bringing back that balance. 


Grow organically, listen to where the signs are taking you - follow your intuition. If it doesn't feel right, don't do it. I have never done anything purely for the money, it has always come from a place of wanting to make a difference in some way to anothers life, so understanding your 'why' you want to do this business is a really good place to start and build it around that.




Tuesday, 20 January 2015

CONFIDENCE NEEDED FOR 2015


Confidence. Some have lots, Some have a little. Did two and half year old me have loads of confidence?

Most people, okay I, want more confidence in myself. I may talk allot and be loud. Change my hair colour often and wear what I want, instead of what is in fashion...

I would say I live my life about 70% how I want. However, there is one area in my life that needs improvement.

Any hints on how to increase your belief in yourself? I think it is something we all face, to some degree. The lack of self worth. But the question: how do you, well, me overcome the fear?

One of the things that holds me back from pursuing my dreams is fear of failure … and the lack of self-confidence that I needed to overcome that fear.

I read an article stating there is a strong distinction between self-esteem and self-confidence. The difference being whether you believe you are worthy of respect from others (self-esteem) and whether you believe in yourself (self-confidence).

However, I believe there are one and the same thing. 

Bettina from Little Old Souls recommend this podcast for me:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bDqj1URcDQ4


So peps, give me your hints on how to improve confidence.

Wednesday, 7 January 2015

AGEISM AND AN AGEING ME



A while back, well it seems like ages ago, I wrote a couple of posts about Comments on My Appearance, and How Old is Too Old? At the same time I wrote about how I feel the world has become so ageist and youth culture seems supreme. Various popular media outlets regularly bombard our already increasingly self-centered, youth-obsessed culture with negative messages about aging and the aged. As a woman closer, and closer to fifty I question my worth as a woman. As an 'older woman'.

I went back to edit it, but then I read the below quote from Annie Lennox, and I think her words cover it exactly how I wanted.

"There's this youth culture that is really, really powerful and really, really strong, but what it does is it really discards people once they reach a certain age. I actually think that people are so powerful and interesting - women, especially - when they reach my age. We've got so much to say, but popular culture is so reductive that we just talk about whether we've got wrinkles, or whether we've put on weight or lost weight, or whether we've changed our hair style. I just find that so shallow."–Annie Lennox, who turned 60 in late December 2014


For 2015 can we not just empower other women instead of knocking them down? 


Note: Image not mine, obtained via Google Images. Trying to track original source. 

Tuesday, 6 January 2015

A BREAK UP LETTER


Dear Ovaries,

I think we need to break up. For all too long this relationship has not been working out for me.
Once a month you have me writhing in pain. In agony, that even on days stops me getting out of bed. You have me inhaling chocolate at an alarming rate. Because of the hormones you produce I cry over nothing. Plus you make my tummy swell to the proportions of a second trimester pregnant lady.
You also fail to give me the thing I want. More children.
While I do appreciate, more than words could ever express, how eternally grateful I am for the two children you did allow me to grow, I do think it is time for this relationship to end.


Love me



Side Note: Images were created a life time ago, on a Film Negative Scanner. Back in the day before Photoshop. 

Wednesday, 26 November 2014

HAVE YOU EATEN SOMETHING?


Okay, so this image may be funny to some, but growing up this was my reality, only change the text to 1950s. I am pretty sure Mum has not eaten much since then. Like Patsy, she too likes to sunbake and drink. Mum, was, is anorexic. Now, I am not going to talk about Mum's demons. they are hers to tell. But for me, I will say, growing up in a house where a mother, a woman clearly hated her body had a direct influence on me.

For years I followed her example, and hated my body, this external hate also included internal hate. Years of trying to have babies and then having miscarriages will do that to you.

Just as I learnt to hate my body, I am now trying learn a healthy love of my body. By adopting a realistic and positive perception of myself, I am hopeful I will teach my two children love for their own bodies and love of other women's bodies.

Does this mean I now don't look in the mirror and find fault? No. Does this mean I have gotten over my insecurities and will start posting selfies? Or shots of myself wearing bikinis? No freaken way. Not there yet. But I am trying, I am working on being thankful for what my body is, and does for me. Not what it doesn't.


Pet hate...magazines covers that declare "too fat", "too thin", "cellulite", and so on. Why are women buying these mags? Is it to make themselves feels better? What is your pet hate when it comes to trashing women's bodies and their self confidence?

note: image not my own, found on Google. 

Wednesday, 19 November 2014

HOW OLD IS TOO OLD?

How old is too old? Is there an expiry date to when women should stop wearing a bikini? This post on Facebook by Julie Cross, and all of the media attention it is getting has got me thinking. I too am a 46 year old Julie, and I wear my bikini when I go to the beach.



Yup, I am 46 years old, I have had two children and I have a morbid fear of exercise. No, that is probably going too far, but it bores me, and I think why waste time doing that stuff, when I can spend it with my children. I am now also a grandma, so does this mean a bikini is off limits for me?

Justin bought me a bikini, not long after I had Jarvis, and I love it, it is comfy and in my opinion cute. Do I think I am cute wearing it? I actually don't give a damm, I wear it cause it is comfy.

Am I confident wearing it? When I put it on, each and every time, I think about my lumps and bumps, then promptly forget it and go and have fun in the sand with Jarvis. Do I think I get comments about wearing a bikini? I am sure I do but like comments on my hair which I wrote about last week, I have never heard anyone say anything. Besides the only people's opinion that I care about is Tamika's and Jarvis.


At the moment Jarvis's face lights up with joy each and every time he sees my tummy. He will even run at me with joy saying "tummy, my tummy" and want to stroke my belly. So, I guess until I embarrass my kids the bikini is here to stay.

(Oh, and do I have a photo of me in my bikini? Not really, but I did look for one. You will just have to stalk me next time I am at the beach.) 

Thursday, 23 October 2014

WELL DONE MUMMAS


The other night I posted a simple image and caption to my Instagram and Facebook page. "Took the bins out. Prepared a roast dinner. Went for a walk. Feed the toddler all while wearing a baby. My esteem and congratulations go out to all those Mummas that do this on a daily basis. Women with more than one small child you are amazing in what you manage each and every day."

It started a conversation, and later I was thinking about what Cherie said "And also, more women need to do THIS every day. Compliment each other. I actually felt legitimately proud of myself reading this whilst wrangling my littles  Sometimes it can honestly be MONTHS in between Dave telling me I am actually "doing good". x

You can find Cherie at Raising Master Max on her Facebook page and blog

I realised that not once in my almost 22 years of parenting has anyone ever told me that I was doing a good job. That is, until a random stranger, approached me this week and said "I have been watching you interact with your son. You are one of the best mothers I have seen in awhile. Your son's beautiful manners are a direct result of your parenting." I mumbled a thank you and she then said "you should be proud. I am a child therapist and mother of six".

I have had many people comment on how well behaved Tamika was, and now how Jarvis is. Yet no one has ever complimented me as a parent and attributed my child's manners to me.

Motherhood is a titled that is earned, oh boy is it earned! It is earned in tears, sleepless nights, and endless worrying. It is earned in fears you have for your child; fears of devastating illness, fears of accidents, and fears of the craziness of the world in which we live.

So to all of the Mums out there, with one, two or more children, let me say... well done you are doing an amazing job.


Oh and I think the above image just about sums up motherhood. I am trying to look like I have it all under control and act like I know what I am doing. However, in reality I am sitting in a cow field, stinking of poo, being bitting on the butt by and ant pretending to know what I am doing. 

Monday, 6 October 2014

MUMS IN BUSINESS: MADEWISE

I stumbled across Jess's Instagram account once night, and instantly fell in love with her beautiful products. From there I followed her to her Facebook page and her Etsy shop.


Without even knowing Jess, I knew her heart resonated with mine, she not only makes the most beautiful hand made products she makes them with love and care. So I asked Jess if she would like to be feature here. 

1. Tell the readers a little about yourself, can you share a bit on yourself and your background?
Hi, my name is Jess.  I’m a stay at home Mum to a beautiful 2 year old boy.  I live in Melbourne with my husband, son and cat.
I’ve always had a love of craft and being creative. My Nanna taught me to knit at age 8 and now at 29 I’m still loving it!
I began making items for friends and after many, many comments on how I should be selling my creations I set up ‘madewise’.

2. What inspires you?
I love the feeling of making something for someone.  I hope the recipient loves the item as much as I did making it and it becomes a special keepsake that they will have forever and perhaps even pass on to their own child/ren one day. 

3. How did you begin your business?
I was already a great lover of Etsy and knew how to make many a purchase from the fabulous assemblage of amazing crafters but knew little about setting up a shop there. So after a bit of research and a bit of courage I opened up a shop of my own and called it ‘madewise’.
The name is a play on my maiden name, Wise. It pays a little piece of respect to my Nanna for not only teaching me how to knit but also for helping raise me. 

4. How do you balance life and running a business?
It can be tough running a business and being a full time mum! I spend most nights sitting up late completing orders while the rest of the house sleeps.
I’d love to say I’m a very organised person and have a  home studio where I do all my creating. But honestly most of my work is done at our dining table and lounge room! So work and home are very much integrated.  

5. What direction do you see yourself and your company heading?
I am thrilled madewise has been so positively received and I’ve been privileged in the amount of lovely customers I have been able to make things for.
I have been blown away by the amazing feedback and reviews left for me by my customers. These people are complete strangers and they love my work and I think what if I didn’t take the plunge and open my little Etsy shop, I would never have had this wonderful experience.
2015 will see madewise offer a new range of items, focussing more on newborn gift sets and will see the introduction of toys and blankets.

6. What advise would you give someone else wanting to start/run their own business?
Take the plunge! You have nothing to loose. If you have the passion and love for what you are doing (and enough ‘spare’ time) others will see this and I believe you will do well. 






Tuesday, 12 August 2014

MUMS IN BUSINESS: THAT WE DO

Two Sydney sisters have joined forces and become "That We Do", making handmade polymer clay jewellery. This is not a sponsored post, I am writing about their company as I love supporting locally made, and Australian artists.



That We Do was conceived at a baby shower, with necklaces given as a thank you gift from one sister to another. This gesture grew with interest shown while they were wearing the original creations and That We Do was born.

The statement on their Facebook page states:
We are inspired to create original pieces that you won't see everyone wearing. Pieces that are eye catching, different and full of colour! Pieces that you can throw on with a plain t-shirt to add a pop of interest or team with a well thought out outfit to give the finishing touch, after all it's the tiny details that make something special! We want our jewellery to help people express their personal style. Each of our pieces are made with love (as our children play around us) and inspired by what we see around us every day in both the natural environment and in the people we love.

Each piece is unique and we cannot guarantee you will receive an item exactly identical to the images shown, this is one of the things that makes our pieces special, no two are the same.

I asked each sister to share a little on their background:
Kat:
On my LinkedIn I refer to myself as a digital and creative industries professional. I suppose that encapsulates what I 'do' the best. I am a journalist by trade, a crafter by passion and these days, when I am not being a mum and acting as one half of ThatWeDo, I work as a digital content manager. When I am not doing that I write books on macramé, put on interactiveart events with Art Gallery of NSW and run various websites, like Kluster. 
I am a little bit obsessed with all things fashion, art and creative culture. My belief that an outfit is not complete without accessories morphed into making them for myself for fun somewhere along the way. Enough people expressed interest in them for me to sit my sister down (who was also partial to making necklaces herself) and ask if she was interested in making necklaces together. She was. The rest, as they say, is history.   
Sam:
In a past life I worked in Marketing for a travel company. These days I am a mum of three children, a student teacher and one half of ThatWeDo. I enjoy making things, cushion covers, clothing, decorations and the like. Last year my partner and I got married and had a naming ceremony for our three children. I spent the year leading up making all the decorations and I loved every minute! I take great pleasure planning and making something and then seeing how well it turns out (mostly!)
Like Kat I have always wanted to be individual and express myself in what I wear and I used to spend many weekends in op shops and the stores of Newtown and Surry Hills to achieve this. However in recent years, time and money made this more difficult so I began to make accessories to achieve this. When Kat started making polymer clay necklaces and suggested we make and sell them together I jumped.

What inspires them in their every day:
Kat:
People, mostly - I love looking at the styles of others. I find stylish, well-put-together people very inspiring. Especially those who display originality and quirkiness. There is nothing more inspiring than someone who goes out on a limb with the way they present themselves and pulls it off. 
I am also incredibly inspired by people who live lives focused on improving the existence of others. Whether it be a passionate politician, a cutting edge not-for-profit CEO, a midwife at the local hospital or teacher at the local school who goes above and beyond.
Definitely my surroundings. The city, the suburbs, the beach at the end of our street.    
Sam:
The environment, both natural and built. The other day I saw a brick turned on it's side, it had rectangles of different sizes cut through it and I thought, those shapes would make a great necklace range. 
Colours, I love to put colours together, particular those on opposite ends of the colour wheel. I love colour, it just makes me happy! 
My kids, I try to put their love and joy for life in each piece. I also want to show them that if something makes you happy you should go for it.
And people, I like to people watch, in a non stalker way!

How do they keep motivated with their business, plus still be parents:
Kat:
Like my sister, my family is my motivation. In particular, setting a good example for my son. I want him to grow up surround by living examples of the fact that dreams are there for the taking and anything is possible if you work hard enough and are willing to invest your all. 
Having said that, staying motivated is easy if you love what you do and I love doing everything associated with ThatWeDo so, in a way, I kind of feel like I am cheating. Sam:

I think it's being a parent that keeps me motivated, I want to show my children you can be whoever you want to be. I am studying to become a primary school teacher as well so I have learnt to use every hour I have in the day and do things that make me happy. Being a mum, studying and ThatWeDo all make me really happy, I genuinely enjoy it all so it's not hard to keep motivated.

Head over to either their Facebook page or Etsy shop to see their full range. But here are a few images to give you a sneak peak.




Wednesday, 2 April 2014

DON'T JUDGE A BOOK BY IT'S COVER.

The English idiom "don't judge a book by its cover" is a metaphorical phrase which means "you shouldn't prejudge the worth or value of something by its outward appearance alone". I think we have all been guilty of this at one point or more in our lives, and I know people have judged me on my outward appearance.

But what would happen if you were not only judged on your appearance and your occupation, but so was your ten year old son?


Below is an article, copied in it's entirety from the Common Ground webpage. Milly is my cousin, as a little girl I use to baby-sit her. She was the sweetest girl who would spend the night colouring in, and then go to sleep with cuddles and me curling her hair in my fingers.

As an adult, Milly is still one of the sweetest people I know. Yet now, she is also an extremely talented artist, a successful business woman, plus a women of great consciousness when it comes to the environment and her fellow man. Milly is a woman of empowerment, who is an inspiration to others on just how successful women can be. She is also the tattooist who has done all of my work (bar for one piece).

At a really low point in my life (after a miscarriage) Milly gave Justin and I similar, tattoos. I call it my magic fertility tattoo. The week-end Milly gave us our peonies I conceived Jarvis! Who needs IVF when you can get a beautiful tattoo instead?!! Hmm maybe I should go back for more tattoos?

Milly free hand drawing Justin's peony tattoo

The finished tattoo

My matching peony

ROCK OF AGES: GUILTY BY MISCONCEPTION
There was a time when tattoos were for sailors and criminals. Ink in the skin meant travels to far-off lands, an anti-establishment attitude or gang memberships. A beautifully ornate sleeve of koi carp, dragons and abstract swirls struck fear into the hearts of many, a signature of the Yakuza, the Japanese mafia, and a warning of trouble at best.
Even today, there are certain tattoos that bare criminal connotations. Tears on the cheek supposedly symbolise the number of people the barer has killed and Latino groups and bikie gangs sport the colours of their clans.
But this is the 21st Century – minds have been opened, culture has expanded and lines have been blurred, if not entirely erased. A tattoo today has no more relevance than our choice of underwear or our hair style.
And yet needle-wielding artists and those baring their subcutaneous sketchings are still being victimised and tarred with that same, centuries-old brush.

Camilla Zavattaro was born into an artistic family. Her grandfather and his father before him were painters and she was immersed in the art world from a very young age.
“From my childhood I watched my grandfather paint with great interest, and he watched his father paint,” Camilla recalls of her youth. “Art was celebrated in my mothers family. They immigrated from France after WW2 with these incredible art pieces, centuries old, that I had connected with. This is when I knew I would be an artist of some sort.”
But, as Camilla entered her teens, a chain of events would transform her perspective of art dramatically. When she was 13 years old, her older brother arrived home with a fresh tattoo covering his entire back and the introduction into the art form was made. Several years later, living in Brisbane, she began tattooing friends just for kicks. Her heart still very much in the art world, she enrolled in college, studying art and refining her natural talents, and it was here that her ‘serious’ tattooing would begin. In a self-confessed “right place at the right time” situation, Camilla befriended a tattooist and her transformation was complete – Camilla Zavattaro was no more, Milly Loveknuckles was born. “It was always definitely something I was always going to do.”

Camilla, Milly, began her professional career in Brisbane, completing her apprenticeship, finding her niche and continually advancing her skills. But five years ago, with the wellbeing of her then five-year-old son at heart, she decided it was time for a change of scene.
“After 10 years of tattooing I decided I didn’t want to raise my son in a city,” she reasons. “I was visiting Lennox Head frequently, it was the right thing to do.”
Milly established Rock of Ages Tattoo Parlour five years ago, launching the business as a solo venture, but expanding rapidly, now with a family of six artists.
“It’s an incredible work environment where everyone is really a part of an individual art movement and the professionalism of the studio,” Milly says of her business. “Our happy place is in the chair, machines in hands!”

Each artist has their own distinct style, favouring particular techniques inspiration and imagery for their individual work. Milly’s personal speciality is in highly illustrative work incorporating flora and fauna. This creates a more proficient studio offering a diverse range of styles, whether they be chosen from a catalogue or brought in by the client.
In Rock of Ages, Milly’s dream and her journey are complete. But outdated prejudice and archaic opinion are continual, and strengthening, adversaries.
In 2012, the Tattoo Parlours Act was updated. The licensing policy now required each individual to be scrutinised, with background checks, criminal records and even the personal opinion of the police commissioner coming into play to grant the $700, three-year license. And this was just for an individual to practice in an already registered, and similarly scrutinised, parlour.
These laws are in place for good reason. They aim to ensure hygienic, high quality services and restrict criminal activity, known to have been associated with tattoo studios in years gone by. But are these policies squeezing way too tight on an industry that caters just as much to lawyers, bank managers, respectable mums and doctors as it does to bikies and bank robbers? I have known of chefs, builders and other tradespeople involved in criminal activities and using the business as a gateway to those exploits, but there’s no such licensing required in those industries.

“The government are directly taking Australian citizens human rights away, through the disguise of misnamed laws such as the ‘anti- biker’ laws,” States Milly. “It has given the police the power to incriminate or incarcerate people as they choose, be it for protesting, misguided actions, having an organised group (of any kind they see unfit), or recently incarcerating a librarian, mother and community worker for wearing her boyfriend’s bike vest in public. She was jailed, not realising the implications of simply wearing a piece of clothing.”
Tattooing is an industry in which laws are required, that could not be disputed. But the levels to which tattooists need to comply, the false implications they receive simply because of their choice in career and a ‘guilty until proven innocent, and even then carefully watched with suspicion’ mentality are making it harder and harder to ink someone’s skin.
“Tattooists were recently ostracised by similar ‘anti biker’ misguided laws,” says Milly. “New South Wales and Queensland have new laws of licensing to weed out the gang related tattoo shops by incriminating every single tattooist. It is a licensing which YES we need, I completely agree, but to fingerprint myself, a positively active person in the community, member of the business Chamber of Commerce, who has never worked in a criminals shop is a farce.”
With the individual tattooing licenses and over $2,000 paid out every three years by each and every studio, one has to wonder where funds from this governmental cash-cow are going. But, however the collected license fees are being collected, it is near impossible to see how they are benefiting the industry they are trying to ‘protect’. It would seem, at least at first glance, that these policies are victimising an industry that, yes, has had a less-than-rosy history, but has come a long way since shady, port side parlours and mementos from time served in ‘the Big House’.
Surely this implementation of laws and regulations should be benefiting this now widely accepted industry. But, as Milly shares, the reality is far from a business protected and supported by governmental policy:
“Where is the NSW work, health and safety courses that come with the millions of dollars we are paying for our license?, where is the policing of home tattooing that spreads hepatitis, mutilation of under aged people and so on?”

The injustice and imbalance doesn’t even end at the point of a needle. The individual, the business, even the family members of a legally sanctioned artist. With a total disregard to human rights, personal history or, it would seem plain common sense, these laws are indiscriminately placing black marks against the names of entirely innocent citizens.
This extends beyond the bounds of rationality, even Milly’s 10-year-old son having his name recorded as, quote-unquote, a potential criminal or gang member, simply for being a trustee in his (also entirely innocent) mum’s business.
“This is devastating,” admits Milly. “My son doesn’t even get the chance to make a mistake in life, being already recorded as a potential criminal.”
Not that deviant behaviour is likely to come to Milly’s progeny, but even the virtually innocent act of accidental speeding, a crime of which, grandmothers, charity workers or nuns may fall prey to, will result in significantly more severe repercussions, simply because his mum is an artist.
Public opinion of tattooing, for all but those backward-thinking conservative types, has totally changed. There is no longer anything disrespectful or underclass, let alone criminal about permanently adorning your skin. It is often a beautiful personal expression of love, spirituality and creativity. But, as is a familiar story, the government refuses to change with the times.
“This fear mongering in the media is 10 years too late,” Milly iterates. “Tattoo studios have been a place of creativity and personal connections for a long time – it is intimate and an honouring of our bodies, now more than ever. The outcome needs to be a union of the people of this entire country to dissolve our government’s ‘smoke and mirrors.’
“Times are changing. We need to unite to make sure we are honoured individually as people of Australia.”

You can find out more about Rock of Ages Tattoo Parlour or contact Milly and her team through their website,www.rockofagestattooparlour.com.