I sometimes believe the ‘stuff’ they do not teach you in schools can
often be your best education. After completing year 12, I moved the very next
day to Brisbane . Within
a week I got a job on Bribie Island . So I moved from
my friends couch, to my Grandmothers house on the island.
Me, back in 1985.
It was here, with Pat, I believe I got some of the best education and
life skills I could have ever hoped for. Some bad, she taught me how to drink
anyone under the table. Yes I was once a drinker. I also became a full time
smoker with her. After all, you can not have a drink in one hand with out the
ciggie in the other. OMG, her house must have stunk with the two of us puffing
away.
But it was over these two bad habits that each night we would talk. I remember
coming home from work and we would sit on the back veranda in summer, or on the
couch in winter, and talk and talk.
Pat talked to me about everything. She was the first person that I
learnt to debate with. We would argue and we would agree. But always we
respected the other person’s opinion.
There were conversations about sex, Pat and I had the most honest
conversations about sex I had ever had before. I remember the first time she
talked of oral sex, I almost chocked on my wine. But then she said, women
need to learn from each other. That sex is good as long as you are having for
the right reasons. As in to please yourself, and never have sex to please
anyone else.
Pat spoke of religion to me, and said it does not matter what god we
believe in that every god has the same version of this one rule, that being “Do
unto others”. If we treated everyone else how we wanted to be treated, the world would a better place.
We spoke of many things, but the most important lesson I think she
taught me is that it is never too late to change. That there isn't a use by
date, to learn new skills and to improve yourself and your mind. That to close
your mind is the true sign of ignorance.
Pat I miss you more than I would have ever thought possible. I think it
is fitting that three of Pat’s life lesson stay with me to this day, as Pat
would always give three kisses hello and three kisses goodbye. Three kisses, I
love you.
Your grandmother was very wise. I'm glad she taught you that it's never too late (I was taught the world had passed me by at 16).
ReplyDeleteMy Nana's name was Pat too.
She was a beautiful, amazing, talented woman. Who learnt to paint late in life and by the time of her death was exhibiting her work. She is a woman I aspire to be like. An artist and an amazing seamstress....yes I want to be like her.
DeleteBeautiful words, beautiful memories. I may have shed a tear or two... xx
ReplyDeleteNo! No crying around Pat. Even at her funeral service it was a celebration of all things Pat. Held at the Art Gallery with copious amounts of wine. (okay I cried for months and months after she died)
DeleteBeautiful post Julie and a wonderful tribute to your Pat. I've mentioned my nan before who was also called Pat and also meant more to me than anyone else, you've sent me down memory lane.
ReplyDeleteWas you Pat as beautiful, inside and out as mine? If so she must be an amazing woman as well.
DeleteShe sounds like such an amazing women...and it sounds like you two had an amazing relationship.
ReplyDeleteShe was my Grandmother. Then I went to live with her and she became my inspiration. I miss her so much.
DeleteA lovely dedication to your late Grandmother, who was obviously a big, big part of your life. x
ReplyDeleteShe was, and I guess in a way she still is a big part of my life.
DeleteYou are so stunning!!! Beautiful picture.
ReplyDelete18 year old me thanks you. Think it is the only time in my life I have actually had a bit of weight on me.
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