SIMPLE WORDS AND NOT AGING GRACEFULLY

Simple words can mean so much. Last night Jarvis told me my hair was "lovely" and was patting it. This morning in bed he said "golden hair, adorable". I love how he gives compliments. I can only hope when he gets older he will continue to do this for myself, and others.

So if you follow me on instagram you will know that opps I went and coloured my hair again. Yeah, yeah, I know I was going to go a 'normal' colour. But life is too short to be boring. 

Think this makes ten or more different colours since I turned 46 in September. Pitty I don't have a photo of each colour. Guess, since Justin is always too busy to take my photo, I should learn how to take a selfie. 

Mid-life crises? Definitely not aging gracefully. 

COMMENTS ON MY APPEARANCE

So, I work in retail. I smile allot. I talk allot...probably too much. But, does this give open invitation to comments about me? About my appearance? Granted most of the comments are lovely and flattering, but then there are a small percentage that are just rude.

If I take the nice. does this mean I have to accept the rude?

On Sunday I changed my hair colour, I thought it was a subtle change, yet it has bought a massive amount of attention.

From the nice. A little girl approached me, and asked what colour my hair was, when I asked her what colour she thought it was she said "princess hair". An elderly lady told me my hair made me look "glowing and happy" and hugged me. Plus, I have had heaps of general comments of people just saying they like my hair.

A few have asked if it takes for ages to do my hair.

To a lady who said yesterday "I like your hair colour, but don't you think you are too old? How am I meant to answer that? Yes lady I think I am too old for this hair colour that is why I did it.

Another lady asked why I was wearing a wig.

Another said, in front of me loudly, to her friend "when someone gets as old as her and does that to her hair it is just desperate attention seeking, she is obviously either gay or single". Lady being either gay or single is not a bad option in this world, and what has that got to do with the colour of my hair?

So tell me, do you think it is okay to comment on strangers appearance?  Especially to their face?

DON'T LET YOUR SWEATY CHILD FALL ASLEEP ON YOU AS YOUR HAIR COLOUR WILL STAIN THEIR FOREHEAD

WHY I CHANGED MY HAIR COLOUR

Throughout my life I have had many hair colours and many styles. But for the last five years I have had safe hair. A blunt fringe, and all the one length, and red. Okay, so not everyone would think my red hair was safe, but in a world of rainbow hues, I thought the red was probably the most normal.

Image by Jam Photographics

Going into Norris to pick up my Crazy Colour in Fire Red was akin to visiting Baskin N Robbins with all those choices. I know Chocolate Mousse Royal is my favourite, yet sometimes you feel the need for Rocky Road. I thought I was too old to try a 'different' colour but it is strange how being told you may have bone cancer makes you change your mind.

So I figured it's my birthday and, if I have to loose it because of chemo then why the F__k don't I just do it.

Oh, yeah the BC thing. I always thought I was going to be open and honest on here, so here it is.....

I have made no secret to my desire for a dozen or more babies. I have alluded to the struggles to fall pregnant and the miscarriages I have had. So a couple of months ago I went to see my doctor, thought I would get a full health check and see where my FHS levels are. Basically am I dreaming? Am I way too old to have another baby?

What I did not expect was to be told I was still very fertile, and very healthy, all bar for one major concern she had with my blood. A conversation about white blood and red blood passed in a blur and I was given a referral to a Hematologist. Hematologist took more blood and did more tests.

From there he referred me to an Oncologist. Yes things got scarier. After a two and half hour wait with no food, and the day after Jarvis's surgery I go into see my oncologist again. So I was tired and stressed already. I was told Option A was Bone Cancer, Option B was something wrong with my Spleen (he did explain something about an enlarged spleen which is over active in its role of filtering the white and red blood cells.). Umm can I have an option C?

So more blood tests and a full body scan. Left me thinking why the hell was I worried about being too old for a hair colour? It is my hair, if I lost it all I would be pissed off at myself for not doing what I wanted. So after the full body scan I went to Norris and pick Cyclamen. A pretty colour but still not too crazy.

Friday half way through the colour change I get a phone call from my Oncologist. Well not from him, those guys keep you waiting and never call you. From his receptionist. He would like to see me sooner than my next allotted appointment can I come in on Tuesday? Umm he keeps me waiting and now he misses me? Bloody men.

So Tuesday I go back to Oncology at the Mater Private Hospital. Another blood test and a feel up by two separate doctors and I am informed I have option B. I may or may not have done a little happy dance. No BC. I feel as if I have equaled winning Lotto with my dodge of cancer. There will be on going stuff to deal with the spleen, but that I can deal with. I am not going to let a dodgy spleen get in my way.

So me and my Banti's Syndrome have a new hair colour. I spent the last couple of weeks going through in my head what if I had cancer and what if I died. I know morbid aren't I? But I came to the conclusion, other that not being around for Tamika and Jarvis, I really only have a couple of regrets on things I have not done. That over all I am happy with my life and very lucky. My biggest issues are my stress levels and my self doubt.

So my promise to myself after dodging the BC bullet is to be kinder to myself and to stop putting myself last. My hope is with this I will decrease my stress levels. So today my CyclamenHair and Me are going to do so sewing and forget about packing and moving house for now. 

ps don't you love my photo? Justin took it for me. 

Oh, and if you have not done so yet, pop on over to my Facebook page Iliska Dreams and give me a like