BREASTFEEDING JARVIS

My breastfeeding journey has come to an end. Neither Jarvis nor I are happy about it. I remember on one hospital visit the mid-wife asked if I was going to breastfeed. I answered I would if I could. She then proceeded to give me an hour long lecture on the benefits of breastfeeding. I ended up cutting her off her tirade. (We asked for a new mid-wife soon after this visit, for this and many other reasons.)

Jarvis one day old

Even though I was stoned from the cesarean, I still knew how important it was to latch Jarvis on as quickly as I could. What an excellent feeder he turned out to be! What the mid-wife did not understand, I always wanted to feed Jarvis, as I did with Tamika, but I understand not all of the time do we get what we want.

Being a stay at home Mum afforded me the luxury of demand feeding Jarvis. Which I did until he was about 14 to 15 months old. I stopped the day feeds as my weight was dropping off way too much. But I kept up the sleep feeds. Both of us loved it. Jarvis would snuggle in my arms and look at me with such contentment when feeding, I knew I was doing the right thing by continuing the feeding.

However, last week on advice from my doctor I need to take a different medication, one in which I cannot breastfeed. So, as of Thursday night last week, I stopped feeding. It has been torture for us both. Jarvis will scream for over an hour, tearing at my chest trying to get a feed. He screams and arches his back; I am scared I will drop him. This from a child who rarely cries and has never thrown a tantrum. It goes on and on until he falls asleep, and it is not a good sleep he whimpers and if I even attempt to put him down, he wakes and starts the crying all over again.

So each morning and afternoon, I sit and hold my child for at least three hours. Yes that is over six hours a day. He is so unhappy it hurts my heart. At night I have to go to bed with him, and he will lay there holding my hair in his sleep as if I am going to leave him. During the wake time he has been a little bit clingy, not only to me but to Justin and Tamika as well.

Logically I know I need to take this medication, and that breastfeeding has to end at some point. But Tamika self weaned at around 22 months and it was easy for both of us. Jarvis and I are not finding this easy. Plus there is the added pain of having concrete boobs that are leaking. So much for those people who said I would not have enough milk at my age! And of course when Jarvis is crying and throwing himself about, he head butts my chest and milk goes everywhere, which makes him all the more upset.

I know this will stop, but right now it is not easy.

 

Jarvis a couple of hours old. Latched on easily.

15 MONTHS

15 Months old! How quickly the time is passing. Jarvis is growing so fast. My little baby no more, he is a full on climbing adventurer. We took Jarvis to Fiji, again he proved himself to be an amazing traveler. Nothing fazes him. Planes, customs, hotels, new people, for Jarvis it is all good. In fact each time we have traveled it is as if we leave and younger version behind and return to Brisbane with a more grown-up boy.

Since coming home Jarvis has turned into a climber, up and over ever thing. Yes he scares me, but each time he climbs something new, and or higher, he turns to me with such a proud look on his face, I just have to hold my breath and try to not be scared for him. 

A list of this month’s achievements/favourite things would have to include:

*Jarvis can fake cough, like an old man smoker.

*Laugh like he is the funniest thing ever.

*He also loves to blow raspberries on Justin’s and my tummies.

*As already mentioned, Jarvis has turned into a climber.

*Jarvis is still breastfeeding, but only before, morning nap, afternoon nap, and night sleep.

*Oh, and the night sleep, don’t want to jinx it, but for a whole week now hr has finally slept through the night 8 to 10 hours of glorious uninterrupted sleep.

*Jarvis has increased his vocabulary ever so slightly, Daddy, Cat (for every animal), Tir (Tira is the cat), Kaka (Tamika), but he has yet to say Mum in any form.

*Jarvis is communicating more, even if it is just grunts and pointing, he is attempting to tell us things. 

*Jarvis also understands us so much more when we talk to him. I will tell/or ask him something and then he does as I ask.

*Jarvis eats, no he hoovers up food all day, everything and anything, but sultanas are still the favourite.

*Jarvis insists on closing cupboard doors, and will go up behind people closing them.

*Jarvis loves to clean his teeth. If he is upset, giving him his toothbrush makes him happy.

*Jarvis loves the water, a bath during the witching hour calms him, and Monday swimming lesson with Daddy makes him so happy.

*Jarvis is a loud talkative boy at home, yet shy when around people he does not know.

*People still think Jarvis is a lot older than he is, I often get people assuming he is at least two. He is tall with big goofy feet.

*Jarvis is a rough boy, and adventurer, yet is full of cuddles and kisses for people he is close to.